nce upon a time, there were two young princesses who loved glittery things.
They were gaga for glittery lip goop.
They were all aflutter for glittery, fairy dust.
They were positively passionate about glittery nail polish.
They were star-struck over glittery ball gowns.
They were all about the glittery art projects.
Because, after all, everything looks better when it sparkles.
But these princesses had a problem. Glitter is messy. It sticks to all surfaces. It can hide, survive and resurface after days and weeks, even after extensive cleaning and lint brush rolling. Not that they cared. But unfortunately, the king did. Quite a bit. So much so, that he banned all glitter from his kingdom. He decreed that he was:
Fed up with finding glitter on his royal couch.
Entirely done with discovering glitter on the soles of his royal shoes.
Completely unwilling to tolerate any more glitter on the skin and scalp of the royal prince.
In sum -- he was done.
The princesses protested. "Please!" they pleaded. "Glitter makes the world pretty." "How can we live without glittery headbands, dresses and art projects?"
At first, they continued their glitter habit in private, quickly stowing the evidence when his majesty entered their presence. But the king was not fooled. And the king was not kidding. He made life very difficult for the queen, who did all she could to eradicate any trace of the offensive substance from the royal palace. But it was not enough.
One evening, upon finding traces of golden glitter on his royal couch and royal behind, the king took desperate action. He grabbed hold of one of the princess's favorite royal ball gowns and pulled (much like one of Cinderella's evil stepsisters) with all his might in an attempt to rip and destroy that glittery garment, so that it could never be worn again. He did not succeed (perhaps not for lack of strength, but for shame at how low he had stooped). But he did forever damage it.
Wide-eyed and dismayed, the princesses complied with the decree from that day forward and were doomed to live anything but happily ever after. But thankfully, even angry kings can change their ways or at least get distracted.
The princesses still enjoy their glitter from time to time, but never with the carefree abandon of those early days. Now the glitter must stay in its strictly designated spot. And when the queen (who is quite conscientious about cleaning,
by the way) happens upon a speck of glitter, she cleans it up quickly so as not to leave a trace. But -- although she will never admit it -- she does from time to time place a speck or two inside the king's royal shoe, or on the king's royal behind. Just for fun. Glitter does make the world a prettier place, after all. Even if the king doesn't think so.