Notes from Home

As if it's not enough to be constantly barraged by my children's oral demands, they also enjoy making written ones.  Here are a few of my favorites from the past few months.

Post-it note from daughter instructing me to meet her in her room after getting baby brother down for the night.  

Note from daughter with her breakfast "orter."  I received this shortly after we returned from a cruise.  I let her know that (so sorry) I would not be entertaining meal orders at home.  

Note another daughter left for me one evening when she was giving me the silent treatment but wanted desperately to have a slice of the cake the rest of the family was eating.

It's nice to know I'm needed, but sometimes I could do with being needed a little bit less.  

Ask Not What Your Mother Can Do for You

Soft and Clean by Leslie Graff

I was never going to be that mother.  You know the type.  The kind that chides disobedient children with "Just wait until your father gets home."  I was going to be a force to be reckoned with in my own right -- never one to admit weakness by calling in the reinforcements.  Well, I'm ashamed to admit that I have resorted to the tactic in desperate moments.  

On Saturday, I had pretty much had it already by 10 a.m.  I was still in my pajamas, flitting from room to room in my efforts to clean the house while dealing with a million requests from children who were more hinderance than help.  "Mom, I'm bored!  What can I DO?!"  "Mom, I'm thirsty."  "Mom, I'm hungry."  "Mom, [brother/sister] is bothering me!"  "Mom, I need help to wipe."  "Mom, I don't know what to wear; come choose my clothes."  "MOM, help me NOW!"  So, I did it.  I called my husband downstairs (he was working in the office upstairs) and told him he had to talk to them.  What he said was actually quite good.

Let me first say, that it completely irks me that they will listen to him in rapt and respectful silence, when I seem to be received more like sound and fury signifying nothing.  But irritation aside, I was impressed. He told them they are treating me like Cinderella.  They pepper me with their demands and act as if I'm their servant.  Instead of "Mom, I need something to eat!" try asking "Mom, are you hungry?  Would you like me to get you something to eat?"  Instead of "Mom, I'm bored!" try "Mom, what can I do to help you?"

Folding clothes from the other room while eavesdropping on the speech, I couldn't help thinking of John F. Kennedy's 1961 Inaugural Address, where he offered the now-famous suggestion:  "Ask not what your country can do for you -- ask what you can do for your country."  My children did indeed need such a speech.  Maybe your children do too.  Now I will take the opportunity from time to time to remind them to ask not what their mother can do for them, but rather what they can do for their mother.

And the beautiful thing?  The speech WORKED.  At least for a little while . . . .